Saturday, June 28, 2014

Let's Start At The Beginning….

Our love story with our baby really begins a few years back. Upon much pondering and fear of the commitment to really try to conceive, we finally decided that we would just give it a go and see what would happen. We tried for maybe two months in a row, and then I got scared and decided maybe I really wasn't quite ready for a baby yet, as the reality of the thought crept into my mind that I could quite actually become a parent if we kept this up. (Go figure that it was always me who was freaking out, and meanwhile, my mellow husband was totally calm and collected and was just going with the flow of whatever I decided for us on the matter!) So, we stopped trying and went about our lives.

Fast forward nearly a year later, and we started the "baby talk" again. For those of you who keep in touch with us regularly, you'll probably remember this as right around the time my brother got married (summer of 2012).

In fact, we rented a hotel and didn't stay at my parents' house that weekend because we were on the path to making a little one. Or so we thought. This time around, with the exception of me having one minor freak out moment about, "are we really doing this?!", we started really trying for a baby. We were pretty naive in thinking that it would just happen. We figured there would be no problem because we were fairly young still and both totally healthy…or so we thought.

So, we tried for some time with no success. Finally, after a few random doctor appointments (non ObGyn related), I decided to change doctors and switch from Sutter Health in Roseville to Sutter Health in Davis and picked up a new dermatologist, ObGyn, and family medicine doc along the way - much to my delight thus far.

Upon my first visit with the new ObGyn, she asked me about trying to conceive and we discussed the fact that although I had been told and she sort of thought nothing was wrong, that she still wanted me to come back for another visit where we would do a sonogram just to make sure. She also sent me on my way to do some blood work.

About a week later, I was at a conference for work (July 2013), when I got a vm from the doctor's office. It was not good! I won't go in to details, mainly because I don't want to rehash it in my own mind, but a few things you wouldn't want to be elevated or come back as abnormal appeared on the lab results. Needless to say, I was really shaken up. I called my husband and he helped me get an appointment asap with my doctor and helped me calm down, in addition to helping me be able to talk to a consulting doctor over the phone (my doctor was out on vacation at the time) who told me that the lab results really could mean nothing at that point because there were a few things that could be throwing the results off…but without a sonogram, there was no way to tell what was really going on. So, we needed to wait until we could get that taken care of.

Approximately a few days later, I went back to see the doctor (by myself) and she performed a sonogram. Literally, within about 30 seconds, she said, "there's a fibroid… and there's another one…and that looks like endometriosis…and this could be some scar tissue." I sat up in utter shock. I had always thought there was the possibility that I had endometriosis, but because I'd been told no for so long, I had basically convinced myself that I was fine. Knowing what my mom went through, I was totally disappointed. I left the office, went to the parking lot, sat in my truck, and cried. Then I called Dustin. (Story of my life: Have a mental breakdown, cry, and call Dustin to make it better. He is amazing. I'm beyond blessed!)

*Side note: for nearly two years I had been telling my previous family medicine doctor specific medical details and family history that led me to believe I may have endometriosis. (Not familiar? Look it up. It sucks!) My mom had this and tried to conceive for FIVE! years and has her own unique story as well. Additionally, at least two of my cousins that I know of had this condition as well. The doctor kept telling me she thought I was fine, though, even with me bringing it up more than once and even asking if we should just do some testing in order to completely rule it out altogether. She basically told me should thought I was fine and that I was probably making it sound worse than what it was. I really liked her, don't get me wrong, but this has forever convinced me that sometimes you really have to take your health in to your own hands. It's like those Dateline and 20/20 shows you always see, where the person knows deep down that something is medically wrong with them, but doctors continue to tell them they're crazy or whatever, and then one day they finally get a doctor who will listen to them, and then they find some insane disease or medical issue that leads to a medical miracle. Well, my situation wasn't that dramatic, but it definitely reminded me of something that I SO firmly believe in, and that is: ALWAYS trust your gut instinct! Along with: don't be afraid to be your own health advocate!

After the sonogram appointment, my doctor left me with the plan to discuss things with my husband, think about a few different options for future family planning, and schedule another appointment in a week to discuss everything.

A week later I was back in her office, this time with Dustin by my side, and she reviewed with us her findings from the sonogram. In less than 10 minutes she looked at me, gave me a couple of options for moving forward with trying to conceive, and I asked her, "If you were me, what would you do?" She replied, "I'd have surgery." I said, "Then let's schedule it." I firmly still stand by the notion that had she said, "Ok, let's do it now", I would have said, "Alright, let's roll!"


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